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AUTHORS NOTE
I’m not here to hand you therapy in a paperback. I’m not a psychologist, counsellor, or “relationship expert.” I’m a woman who’s spent over two decades sitting across from blokes, in boardrooms, cafés, pubs, and on job sites, hearing the same stories on repeat. I’ve been the accidental counsellor for mates, clients, and colleagues, helping them unpack the mess before it blew up or after it already had.
My day job is teaching foresight and broadscanning in business, spotting patterns, predicting problems before they hit, and finding practical solutions that actually stick and holding clients accountable to their decisions. Turns out, those same skills work bloody well when applied to relationships. Combine that with a lifetime of Stoic Thinking and a strong belief in personal responsibility (we are our choices), and you get my style: collaborative but direct, no sugar-coating, no tiptoeing.
I’ve been selectively single for decades. That’s not a failing, it’s a conscious choice. It’s given me the luxury of observing, listening, and learning without being blinded by my own relationship drama. The insights in this book aren’t academic theories. They’re the distillation of real conversations, real mistakes, and real wins from men who’ve had the guts to ask, “What am I missing here?”
Read this with an open mind. You might not agree with everything, that’s fine and it’s also kinda the point. But if something makes you stop, think, and maybe do one thing differently, then it’s done its job. You’ve got nothing to lose except the same old patterns that keep wrecking good things; and maybe, just maybe, a lot to gain.